Keep Calm and Remember Sensory!

As a person who has a high anxiety level, I understand how difficult it can be to navigate through each day with all of the feelings associated with anxiety: insecurity, fear, self-doubt, worry and stress. I imagine for children on the spectrum, this is multiplied greatly by the lack of coping experience.

I have experienced time and again how my stress and anxiety negatively affects my son. For example, if I'm rushing on a school morning and the kids are moving at their own pace, my anxiety level raises. I begin to get upset, raise my voice--even yell. Instead of calming myself, I've now created an atmosphere of anxiety that sets up a bad day for everyone. To help with this, I try to prepare the night before by packing lunches, setting out clothes, putting out cereal bowls, etc.

I think the key to reducing the stress is planning ahead. Last year, I would get Ben up early and do sensory exercises to help him regulate himself before school. He would jump on the trampoline, swing, do jumping jacks, etc. Then, we'd do some deep breathing and try to relax before entering the school.

I also asked teachers to help. They allowed Ben to roll on a therapy ball, or take time-outs. They allowed him to use a computer instead of writing assignments, since handwriting causes anxiety.

One of the first books ever recommended to me was "The Out of Sync Child Has Fun", which offers great resources for kids dealing with sensory processing challenges. Understanding the link between sensory processing and anxiety helped me find ways to prevent some of the anxiety and respond to it while it happened. There are many resources that offer practical ideas for home and school. "My Sensory Book" offers suggestions for different sensory systems: tactile, vestibular, proprioception, visual, auditory, gustatory and olfactory, and illustrates how children can learn to cope more effectively. 

Websites like Specialism also have sections dedicated to sensory processing with valuable information for different settings, sensory challenges and age groups. 

Practicing conscious calming for myself and Ben has made a huge difference. It's not always easy, but it always works.